Jay Leno: "As you know, Congress voted against the bailout. See, the problem" in this case is that "members of Congress...were told to vote their conscience. And of course, this totally confused them. 'Conscience?'"
David Letterman: "I guess you heard the news" that "the House killed the bailout plan. So Washington failed to act? Oh, I didn't see that coming. Wow!"
David Letterman: "But...we have the big vice presidential debate coming up on Thursday," and "Sarah Palin is busy preparing." Right now, for example, "she is practicing her caribou caught in the lights look."
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